I think it's safe to assume that Professor Richard Lynn of Ulster University has been thinking of other men's penises a lot lately. How else would he have arrived at the finding of his latest study?
Professor Lynn is notorious for his controversial papers and doesn't shy away from taboo subjects. He claims he gathered the data from websites, which is code for watching a lot of porn. Predictably, the jingoistic British newspaper The Daily Mail is using the findings as an excuse to indulge in Britain's favorite pastime, French bashing as they celebrate the number 12 spot.
We, South Africans, come in at number 7, which I'd like dispute based on the survey of 1. I demand a commission of enquiry. Here is one of my preemptive recommendations: those responsible for dragging our national average down should be deported.
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